Pssst.  Over here.  In the coffee cup.  It's me, Java.  I'm hiding from the paparazzi.  Yes, I'm all over the news today.  I'm no stranger to fame. I've been all over the internet for years, on blogs on cell phones, smart cards and every other device.  I'm even on Mars.  I just needed a little break from all the publicity.  You can read all about the big announcements on every other Sun blog.  The world is celebrating that I am now available to the Open Source Community.  But did anyone ask ME how I feel about it?  And I'm not talking about Java ME, I'm talking about ME, Java!

It's not that I'm not grateful to Sun.  I know if it weren't for Sun, I wouldn't even be here.  Together, we changed the world.  I don't mean to be immodest, but I am HOT!  But still, did I really ask to be available to everyone? They've already seen my code. Must I give up all my privacy? I will have every developer knowing everything about me...putting their hands all over me, customizing me!  I'm feeling a little exposed.  And then there are all the tabloids talking about my many relationships.  How is Linux going to feel knowing of all my experience with so many devices?  I know I'm very compatible and relationships are easy for me, but sometimes I'm just happy to sit here alone in a coffee cup amongst the techno-phobes.

And what's up with that Duke fellow?  What IS he? Some kind of walking triangle?  And why is his nose so red?  Did anyone ever wonder about that? Sure, he's an enthusiastic fellow, but I need a break from him, too.  Just let me sit here quietly and relax amongst the artists.  Oh, here comes someone now.  He probably has never even heard of Java.  He's just looking at me like I'm an ordinary cup of coffee.  Ah...normalcy.  Wait....  Put down the cup!  You don't understand!!  I'm JAVA! You can't drink me!  The world depends on me!  Nooo....Noooo...  AAAGHHHH