Mostly Harmless

Off-bike plugins

More training modules for the Off-bike.

Thanks are due to the helpful commentator who supplied the following suggestions:

• A car door opening unexpectedly
• A dog - particularly one attached to one of those stretchy-but-almost-invisible-cable-driven leads stretched across the cycle path (hilarity ensues)
• Riding a SWB recumbent bike and trying to do virtually anything at very low speed.

These are all good - although I have passed them on to the simulator arm of the Off-bike Project (possibly to be coupled with the haptic jacket of VR fable).

Some I have thought of since, which could reasonably be added to the bike itself, are:

• A sudden very loud noise (from a generous catalogue of loud noises)
• Brake failure - but I think this is a distinct competence
• Catastophic flat
• Seizure of the rear wheel (an option to seize the front wheel could attract high insurance premiums and get us on to the wrong sort of chat-shows etc.)
• Exploding goggles (simulates flying grit). Actually all it needs is a blanking mechanism over one or both eyes synchronized with a suitable sound effect from the loud-noise generator.
• Wasp-o-matic helmet or bike-cap (the de-luxe version will administer a mild sting-like electric shock while buzzing like crazy)

It would seem quite easy to build these in.

I was once startled by a truck driver who thought it was a neat idea to play the sound of a horse whinnying at extreme volume as he went past. I have a recurring fantasy of his trying this out on a real horse and pleading most pitiably with his insurance company after the horse has demolished his cab. (I didn't fall off but I failed to respond appropriately: i.e. to catch up long enough to read his licence plate).

I was once thrown off when my front tyre went bang while I was whizzing down a hill. I don't know if one can learn to cope with this as I have never repeated the experiment. I do now know that it is possible to bounce more than once on your knees...

Posted at 09:20AM Jul 24, 2007 by John Alderson in Get on yer Bike  |  Comments[0]