Compare and contrast, who gets my business?

I'm a creature of habit. I buy my tires from the same family-owned business—since the 80s. The owner has retired and died in that time, and now his sons own the business, and have their own sons. I know I can get my tires from Costco for cheaper, but I don't care. I tried other places to buy tires, but no one else compares. What's their secret? They are exactly who they say they are. Pictures of the family (Dad's a war hero) are posted in the office. A year's worth of smudged Car & Driver magazines are piled up on the plastic table inside. The taciturn brothers jack up my car and spin the lug nuts off, and in a few minutes I'm back on the road. But, in the meantime I've gotten to sit on the curb and stare at the graveyard across the road for a bit, let my mind wander. I know I'll be back to Holser's Tire Service. What's so great about it? There's no coke machine. No one has been obsequious, or even particularly friendly. I've just been able to be in a business where people are real. I know something about them. They consistently treat me the same way, year after year. I trust them.

Another stand-out is Sweetwater Sound. I've never been there. The company is in Fort Wayne, Indiana, and they are maybe the biggest music store in America.  I bought a couple of things from their on-line catalog, so every quarter or so Kurt calls me. It's not like he's trying to sell me something. He's just checking in with me like a friend. He remembers what we talked about last time, and he never "sells". I also get a catalog every month or so. On every page or two there's another Sweetwater Sales Engineer. and I decided to look up Kurt. Sure enough, there he was, right next to the electronic sequencers, looking every bit like he sounded, casual, friendly, kinda laid-back. I haven't bought any audio gear in a while, but when I do, I know where I'll go.

Contrast this with the 7 emails from Quark in a little over a month. I used to enjoy their sales people calling me every now and then. They were like Kurt—friendly and interested—and they kept Quark top-of-mind for me. But after the third "special offer" in three days, I sent them an email:

"I'm predisposed to like Quark. You're the underdog to Adobe, with what may be a superior product. I don't do print work now, but may return to a job that includes it eventually. However, the impression you've created in the past few days is two-fold: One that Quark is desperate. Only a sinking company would send out so many emails. The other is cheap. This many messages amounts to spam. Before, I thought Quark was there for me should I need them. Friendly "I'm here" reminders, fine. But the tone of the emails is shrill and insistent, and it makes me think I'll get a sales person who is shrill and insistent. Not good for you. I thought you'd want to know, but maybe I'm wrong."

What is it that makes a difference to me? It's surely not cost. It's the sum total of my experience, and get this, my experience with people, that makes a difference. Quark failed not only for it's insistence that I take advantage of "special offers", but for it's failure to provide a person to whom I could address myself. I don't even know if my email will be read by anyone. They'll have to take extraordinary measures to get me back. Best not to have fallen out of favor in the first place.