Jen Crosby's Racing Blog

Monday May 14, 2007

One very broken racer :o(

Long time no write again, but I promise this time I have a good excuse. As I mentioned in my last entry, I went to Cadwell Park to instruct on a trackday. I didn't manage to get home again for two weeks.

Red and I travelled up the night before, and set ourselves up in the collecting area. In the morning, all was going well, we'd done the sighting laps, and I'd been out in the fast group for a couple of sessions to have a play, as no one had asked for any instruction. In the final fast session before lunch I went out again, wanting to put some good flying laps in. A few laps in, coming down the back straight at the top speed of the bike, I approached Park bend. As I reached the braking point, I went for the brake lever....and it wasn't there. I reached for it again, assuming I'd just missed it, but it had completely disappeared! Time slowed for a while, as I realised that this was going to be a big crash. I thought about how I could slow the bike down – but in the end I realised the best bet would be to make a tactical dismount. As the bike ran onto the grass, I took a deep breath. I had no idea how this would turn out but I knew it wasn't likely to be great... I threw the bike to the left, and myself to the right, landing on the ground still travelling at over 100mph. The next thing I remember was lying wedged under the tyre wall. My right leg was trapped between two tyres about a foot up and I could feel the full weight of the wall on top of me. Within seconds a marshal was stood above me, and I begged him to get the tyres off me, but he said he couldn't until the medics arrived. Thankfully they arrived in mere seconds it seemed. I knew immediately I'd broken my pelvis – I could feel it straight away, but I also had a lot of pain in my back, and in my right leg, which was still trapped in the tyre wall. The medics got to work really quickly, and freed my leg which relieved some of the pressure on my twisted pelvis, but it was absolute agony when they tried to straighten my leg to get me on the spine board. One of the poor medics had to sit for ages holding my leg up while they sorted the rest of me out!! They of course gave me plenty of morphine to try and help me out, which kept me going for sure, but it sure as hell hurt.

I was apparently at the side of the circuit being attended to for about 40 minutes. Red had been brought up to see me, bless her she looked white as a sheet, but it was wonderful to see a familiar face, even though the medics were amazing. They'd called an air ambulance out for me, which arrived fairly promptly, and thy finally had to get me to straighten my leg out for transporting me. So that hurt a lot!! Once on the board I was relatively comfortable, and well morphined up, and they loaded me into the helicopter to go to Lincoln County hospital. Red followed along in the van, and met me in A&E. A&E was a complete blur of people – so many coming in and out of my vision which was massively restricted by the fact that I was fully strapped in round my neck and back. Lots of questions, lots of talking about me in the background. They X-rayed me on the table there, which I could thankfully pretty much ignore (I have a bit of a phobia of scans and X-rays), and due to the damage to my pelvis they then put me in a special brace which tightened round my pelvis to hold it in place. They also said I'd need to go for a CT scan.... which I immediately freaked about! I told the doctor I was really scared of having the scan, and they tried to reassure me, but I knew I'd have to go through with it, obviously! 15 minutes with a machine around my head, chest and pelvis, making horrible churning noises and making me feel sick was not the highlight of the day! I was pretty glad for the huge amount of morphine I'd been given, and I just closed my eyes and tried to go to a happy place!

The scan showed indication of a fractured vertebrae in my lower back, although they were quite happy that it was pretty stable. The doctor also told me that my pelvis wasn't going to to need surgery as it was primarily ligament damage, and that I'd be transferred to a ward. I was very relieved about not needing surgery, I've never been under general anaesthetic and I'm totally petrified of it! Red was with me all the way through A&E and up to the ward, and she'd managed to call all the people that needed to be told, so that was a big task out of the way, thanks hun! I was put onto Stow ward, and was left to rest for the night once it was made sure I was comfortable.

In the morning I was already fed up of having to be flat on my back and unable to see anything in the ward around me. My back was still hurting a lot, and I was on regular pain killers through the night. Fairly early on the consultant that had been assigned to me, along with his team of about 8 other doctors, came by and drew the curtains around the bed. It was pretty intimidating, a whole load of people stood around me taking notes and staring, all only just within my vision with me still being flat on the bed. The consultant explained that my pelvis was indeed broken, and that they'd have to operate on me to plate it back into place. As soon as I heard that, I didn't really hear anything else he was saying. I was absolutely petrified at the thought of having to have surgery, and I was desperately trying to choke back my tears while there were still so many people around me. Once they'd left, I cried for ages, feeling like a right wimp, but just totally overwhelmed by it all.

They scheduled me in for surgery that morning, and I was wheeled in about 11.30, in tears yet again, much to the distress of Red and Greg who came as far as they could with me. Once they left me, one of the ward nurses Natalie looked after me, and she did a great job of trying to calm me down. The consultant came to see me before I went into the anaesthetic room to see if I had any questions – which I did seeing as I wasn't in much of a fit state when I'd seen him earlier that morning! With my questions answered, he also informed me that the suspected broken vertebrae was actually not broken after all, which was great news! Then it was off to be anaesthetised, and I was ridiculously worried. I guess not surprisingly, it was all over very quickly – the anaesthetist was great, and next thing I knew I was back in my bed in the ward.

I pretty much slept the whole day while the anaesthetic wore off, but when I woke up properly, the difference was amazing. The pain from my pelvis had completely gone – the only discomfort was the wound where they'd cut me open. I was really stiff and sore all over though, and I didn't have any strength or muscle in my legs to be able to move them. I've done quite a bit of muscle and tendon damage to my right leg, although it's slowly regaining strength now.

So then started the epic two weeks in hospital. Red and Greg both stayed up for a few days, and my sister and niece, and friends Kat, Mike and Vikki stopped by to visit. It was lovely to have familiar faces around, especially being so far from home! After a couple of day the doctor gave me the ok to sit up in bed, which was a huge relief, and finally I could see the rest of the ward and talk to people! I was told that it would be expected that I'd be out of bed and into a chair (not walking, but transferring using my arms) by the end of the week. It was little stuff like that that kept me going during the week, knowing that I had something to look forward to. The other thing that I was excited about was that Bemsee were up racing that weekend, so I'd be able to see all my friends, and get updates on the racing as it happened.

Somewhat annoyingly I was massively disappointed by the doctors who decided that I'd not be able to get out of bed that week after all. My consultant was away for the latter part of the week, and basically the junior doctor didn't want to make the call to say I'd be ok to get into the chair. I was really gutted, as I'd been desperate to finally get out of the bed, I'd been stuck in it for a whole week by then!

The weekend finally came though, and my friends at Cadwell did a great job of keeping me informed of how the racing was going. It was horrible not being there though, I hate missing race meetings! I had visits from loads of people, which was lovely. On Saturday evening Toby, Nick, Greville, Greg P, Red, Ben, Pat, Vikki, Andy and Steve turned up – I was so pleased to see them all! They'd only managed to get there at about 8.20, after sorting themselves out after racing, and visiting hours finished at 8.30, so I was worried it was only going to be a short visit, but the fantastic nurses offered to wheel me in my bed out to a side ward, where we wouldn't disturb the other patients, and they let everyone stay as late as they liked. We even ordered in pizza!! My stomach was absolutely killing me from laughing, and it felt great to be smiling so much again. It was a fantastic evening, and lifted my spirits so much – thanks a million to all of my wonderful mates!

Finally on Monday the consultant came and told me that I could transfer to a chair with the help of the physios. It was just fantastic being able to get out of bed!! I could finally go and have a shower as well, something I'd been going on about to the poor nurses all week! That first shower was the nicest I've ever had I think, being wheeled under the hot water was just heaven!! I could also spend the day sat in a chair next to the bed, which although I found a little uncomfortable after a few hours, at least meant I could eat sitting up properly.

The consultant also told me that I'd be coming back down to Bournemouth finally, as long as the physios and the occupational therapists were happy with everything. During the whole conversation with him I assumed he meant I'd been transferred to a hospital down here, but in fact he meant for me to actually come home!! I was pretty confused as to how all that would work, especially when he explained that I'd be unable to weight bear (i.e. stand or walk) for another 6 weeks! He explained that I'd be in a wheelchair for that time, followed by another 6 weeks on crutches after that, and that the occupational therapists would sort out how it would all actually come together to be possible in a practical sense. I must admit, I was over the moon at the prospect of coming home, being able to see my friends down here at home instead of in hospital, and just generally feeling more comfortable with being out of hospital. I called Red straight away, babbling away excitedly, not really even clocking what this would mean for her and Ben in terms of the house, and looking after me. She was worried about how we'd manage, how I'd get around and stuff, but once I'd spoken to the Occupational Therapist, I explained to Red how it would all work ok. Once I'd seen the physios too I felt a lot better. They showed me how to transfer myself from the bed to the chair on my own, and were happy that I was strong enough to manage just fine.

It felt like a long week, just waiting to get everything sorted so I could come home. Apart from the wheelchair, there was some other equipment that had to get sorted before my arrival. Between the OT and Red, we had it all arranged so that it would all be there by Friday, and I'd been told by the discharge nurse that they would be able to have an ambulance take me home on Saturday. At the very last minute though that fell through, and I was left on Thursday thinking that I might have to stay another whole weekend before getting home. I was pretty upset – I had my heart set on getting home now, and each day was getting more and more frustrating. But, to the rescue came Pixie Pete. Pete is a St Johns Ambulance man, who does a huge amount with Bemsee, and in true Bemsee-looking- after-it's-members style, Pete fixed it so that he and a colleague would come and get me on Friday afternoon and bring me back home to Bournemouth. I'm massively grateful to Pete and Ian for coming to pick me up – I know it was a big undertaking, coming from Brands to Lincoln, then to Bournemouth and back up to Brands all in one day – that is a lot of driving!! Im so grateful to them both, it was amazingly kind of them.

Coming home was amazing. Red and Ben rushed out when I arrived, Red with glass of red wine in her hand for me!! They'd put up a big 'Welcome Home Jen' banner outside too!!  They'd totally sorted the house out for me, and arranged to pick up my wheelchair too, so I had a bedroom sorted downstairs all ready for me to move in to. Ben had even built a ramp up to the back door for me, so I can even get in and out of the house myself!! Everyone has been so supportive since I've been back – I realise it's not a trivial thing having to look after someone in a wheelchair, even if it's only temporarily. Red has been a complete angel, going way beyond what I would have expected from any friend – she is an absolute godsend.

So there were have it – I'm a week on since I came home now, and I'm managing pretty well really. I've actually been surprisingly busy with various bits and pieces! I even managed to get to Brands Hatch this weekend for the racing thanks to Ben and Steve for helping me get there, and thanks to everyone, but especially Steve, Toby, Pat and Vikki for helping me out during the weekend. It meant a lot to be there, and I had an absolutely brilliant time!

The next step is to see a consultant at Poole hospital in about 3 weeks time for a follow up appointment, and he'll then refer me to a physio, and I'll hopefully be set to get on my feet with the crutches!! I can't wait!!

I know I've mentioned a fair few people already, but I want to say thank you again to some of them. For starters, the marshals and medics at Cadwell Park, who did an amazing job; also the air ambulance crew and all the A&E staff who looked after me so well when I was absolutely petrified of everything. I owe a huge thank you to all of the staff on Stow ward in Lincoln Hospital – they work incredibly hard, doing work I could never do under extreme pressure. They seem to have the utmost patience with people, some of whom don't always seem to be grateful for what is being done for them, and their compassion and kindness is second to none. I can't say thank you enough for looking after me so well in the two weeks I was there. Thank you to all of my visitors, and those who sent cards and left messages on the forum, believe me, things like that kept me sane!! Pete and Ian, and indeed Bemsee for helping me to get home. I think the biggest thanks has to go to Red though – she's an amazing person, who I'll forever be grateful to for everything she's done over the past few months for me. Thank you!!!!

( May 14 2007, 03:42:41 PM GMT+00:00 )

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