Big Fish
I've been transfering my files from my trusty but outdated Win98 computer to something more modern and, in the process, have unearthed some old emails that would have made decent blogs had blogs been around. Here's one from 1995.
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My kids are driving me nuts. Actually, my 3-year old is driving me nuts. Here's a typical conversation:
DAD: Grace, get down from the counter.
GRACE: No, it's Coooo-dy.
DAD: OK, Cody, Daddy says to get down from the counter.
GRACE: You're not Daddy, you're Big Fish.
DAD: OK, Big Fish wants Cody to get down from the counter.
GRACE: It's not Cody any more, it's Belle, now.
DAD: Get down NOW, whoever the *%#$%@ you are!
GRACE: OK, Beast.
She wins by wearing down the opposition. A conversation that should take 1/2 a second lasts three minutes:
GRACE: I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT!
DAD: What do you want, Grace?
GRACE: It's Cooo-dy.
DAD: (Sigh.) What do you want, Coooo-dy?
GRACE: Um, um, I want, um, I want a POPSICLE!
DAD: A popsicle?
GRACE: Yeah! A popsicle!
DAD: Ask nicely.
GRACE: Silence.
DAD: Grace, ...
GRACE: No, it's--
DAD: --Right, right, Cody, Cody, COOOO-DY! You know that if you want Da-- I mean, if you want somebody to get you a popsicle, you have to ask for it nicely.
GRACE: Ask nicery.
DAD: No, don't say 'ask nicely,' just ask for it nicely.
GRACE: Just ask for it nicery.
DAD: [Deep sigh] No, I've explained this to you before, say, "Daddy, can I have a popsicle please?"
GRACE: No, you're Big Fish.
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My kids are driving me nuts. Actually, my 3-year old is driving me nuts. Here's a typical conversation:
DAD: Grace, get down from the counter.
GRACE: No, it's Coooo-dy.
DAD: OK, Cody, Daddy says to get down from the counter.
GRACE: You're not Daddy, you're Big Fish.
DAD: OK, Big Fish wants Cody to get down from the counter.
GRACE: It's not Cody any more, it's Belle, now.
DAD: Get down NOW, whoever the *%#$%@ you are!
GRACE: OK, Beast.
She wins by wearing down the opposition. A conversation that should take 1/2 a second lasts three minutes:
GRACE: I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT!
DAD: What do you want, Grace?
GRACE: It's Cooo-dy.
DAD: (Sigh.) What do you want, Coooo-dy?
GRACE: Um, um, I want, um, I want a POPSICLE!
DAD: A popsicle?
GRACE: Yeah! A popsicle!
DAD: Ask nicely.
GRACE: Silence.
DAD: Grace, ...
GRACE: No, it's--
DAD: --Right, right, Cody, Cody, COOOO-DY! You know that if you want Da-- I mean, if you want somebody to get you a popsicle, you have to ask for it nicely.
GRACE: Ask nicery.
DAD: No, don't say 'ask nicely,' just ask for it nicely.
GRACE: Just ask for it nicery.
DAD: [Deep sigh] No, I've explained this to you before, say, "Daddy, can I have a popsicle please?"
GRACE: No, you're Big Fish.
Ah the conversations of life. That is when I even now just state that unless you listen the first time then things don't happen. ie you don't get the popsicle, you don't get to sit on the counter and help next time, ...
Posted by Dan Lacher on December 21, 2007 at 09:50 AM EST #